Wow what a week. Well it looks like I am going to start my own business. My partner and I are looking for financing and exploring the possibility of actually purchasing our own building. It's really amazing when you consider I was contemplating suicide five months ago. I think I'm getting better, and I think I can control this thing in my head. I'm not getting cocky though, I realize I have to be on the lookout for cycles.
Today will be a short post, because I also want to answer a comment on the blog from a few days ago. So anyway, here are today's deep deep thoughts.
Watching TV tonight I saw a show where a little girl was accidentally allowed to watch her father's death in an emergency room. I came within a few minutes of killing myself a few months ago. I had planned to hang myself in the spare room in the basement and I was 2/3 of the way through my suicide note when my wife interrupted me (you can look at an earlier post and see that she stayed in the room with me until I went to sleep and probably saved my life by doing so).
I was shocked to think that I had almost carried out my plan in the spare bedroom in the basement. A lot of mornings my two year old (recently he became my three year old) will come down stairs to find me as I get ready. If I had carried out my plan I wouldn't have just killed myself, I would have caused my little boy a kind of pain that would have left him in therapy for decades.
I guess it just drives home the point you can't ignore this illness. If you let the illness get out of control it can take control of you. Before you know it you can really screw up your life or loved ones' lives, or just kill yourself and destroy your life and hurt everyone around.
Congrant on the dicison of starting your own business and go ahead full force it is interesting luctarive and make a lot of sense in the end of the day.
About Myself:
Hypothyroidism http://www.ourthyroids.com hypothyroid symptoms, problems, treatments, diet, thyromine low thyroid underactive treatment.
Posted by: thyroid | September 25, 2006 at 05:27 PM